Favorite Hymns

Dentist's Hymn...............................Crown Him with Many Crowns

Weatherman's Hymn.....................There Shall Be Showers of Blessings

Contractor's Hymn.........................The Church's One Foundation

The Tailor's Hymn...........................Holy, Holy, Holy

The Golfer's Hymn..........................There's a Green Hill Far Away

The Politician's Hymn......................Standing on the Promises

Optometrist's Hymn........................Open My Eyes That I Might See

The IRS Agent's Hymn....................I Surrender All

The Gossip's Hymn..........................Pass It On

The Electrician's Hymn.....................Send The Light

The Shopper's Hymn.........................Sweet Bye and Bye

The Realtor's Hymn............................I've Got a Mansion Just over the Hilltop

The Massage Therapists Hymn.......He Touched Me

The Doctor's Hymn............................The Great Physician


For those traveling...


45mph....................God W ill Take Care of You

65mph....................Nearer My God To Thee

85mph...................This World Is Not My Home

95mph....................Lord, I'm Coming Home

100mph..................Precious Memories

Ostrich

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown
Ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders.
The man says, "A hamburger, Fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich,
"What's yours?" "I'll have the same," says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order "That will be
$9.40 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the
Exact change for payment.
The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "A
Hamburger, Fries and a coke."
The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Again the man reaches into his
Pocket and pays with exact change.
This becomes routine until the two enter again. "The usual?" asks the
Waitress.
"No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a
Salad," says the man. "Same ," says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, "That will be $32.62."
Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places
It on the table.
The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir.
How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket
Every time?"
"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning the attic and
Found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me two
Wishes.
My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just
Put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be
There."
"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would ask for a
Million dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want
For as long as you live!"
"That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact
Money is always there," says the ma n.
The waitress asks, "What's with the ostrich?"
The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second wish was for a tall chick
With a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say."